#im so stressed and upset
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has a breakdown over my stupid halloween costume.
#the soldering keeps snapping off for absolutely no discernible reason#my hands are too shaky to work on it#i don't have tin at home anyway#im so stressed and upset#it was going to be done tonight. it really was it just randomly decided to snap off instead.#oh haha that's not even counting the other half of it that doesn't work at all. one half WAS going to be done at least#im. i feel so stupid.#exe
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im really stressed about my upcoming root canal. i dont want my tooth cracked open. i have nerve pain but my tooth doesnt look like anything is wrong. it looks totally fine. the dentists rushed me into booking the session without even explaining anything to me. i keep being told to cancel and get a second opinion but idk how much the dentist is i only have $200 rn.
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Ruining Hank's life with one simple introduction (for the fourth and not final time).
#detroit become human#connor rk800#me trying to get the trophy with connor dying 8 times is kinda killing me! its so! stressful! to fail! QTEs!#also im sorry for making your life miserable hank please forgive me i dont like it either#i feel so bad that im watching a guys mental health decline past the point it already declined before getting involved#as a people pleaser this whole die 8 times for a trophy is agonizing bc im making many people upset#so anyway that second play through is going p bad for me! not a fan! of this whole having to fail QTEs!
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[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]
saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS#REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT#NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS#THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS.#ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of#another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY..#i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her#idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had#when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them.#but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore.#but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think#i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow.#ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that#AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE#I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME#THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE#WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL#in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad#this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks-#-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl-#-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi#gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show#i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!!#anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM
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Bow problems (+ other nonsense)
#saroart#dead cells#the beheaded#the collector#they just wanted a nice bow#the collector can do a lot of stuff but i don't think he's good at bows#i was drawing a lot of antagonistic beheaded/collector content so i wanted to do some more cute junk#okay a lot is an exaggeration. still#need some guys being buds content sometimes#weird monster guys doing domestic shit is my favorite genre#i got a bonus at holiday time and im tempted to buy a tablet i can use portably#esp because holy fuck i don't know how to draw anymore#but also i just spent stupid money on tickets to live podcasts so i probably shouldn't#unrelated im very upset today because fucking UPS didn't ring my goddamn doorbell and so “”missed me“” and couldnt deliver my specialty meds#why must i get my meds through ups#because the us is a hellscape and i am beholden to my health insurance company#ups who has literally never managed to get a package to this apartment#tbh im stressed as fuck about having to go through this every goddamn month
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uhh scared to say this but i want to remind everyone to take care of themselves. its natural to be upset that actors are leaving the show but at the end of the day you don’t know these people and you should not be so upset affects you physically or affects your mental health, makes you anxious or stressed etc this should not consume your life it is actually not good for you at all and it might be a sign you need to take a step back and prioritize yourself
#this was a big reason why i wanted to take a step back from the fandom#having a new thing to be super excited about or stressed about or angry about everyday#and making myself be so upset or nervous or like#buzzing with happiness to the point it consumed me#constsntly#was just really not good for me#it made#my anxiety worse#and just made me feel shitty and i got genuine like panic attacks over some event happening and whatnot#i don’t think its good for your heart lmfao#sorry for the rant j hope im making sense#but like guys pleade please avoid being parasocial#im upset sbout it obviously but like. idk.#take care of yourself#the outsiders musical#outsiders musical#joshua boone#rj higton#maggie kuntz
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Genuinely so curious who Mike thinks is gonna be buying The Cage or the new DCTL GN bc with the way he tweets as far as he's concerned, it's not gonna be:
The queer people he has actively admitted he will never show any representation of in the games.
2. The POC he has actively fought against representing in his franchise. [Who he also mocked for thinking they would be represented in his franchise]
3. The Bendy fandom which has always been concerned with topics of diversity esp in the sense of queer people since its creation. Who he has responded to really poorly esp in regards to the GN.
4. The fans who critique him. [He blocked me for doing so lol]
5. His fans in general who he tweets about like this currently. [He's being vague about why people were mad at him or sent him 'nasty messages' because if you actually looked into why you'd see he was in the wrong. Either way, a very hateful way to speak abt ur own fanbase.]
Reminder while Mike is trash talking his fans he has always treated them rather poorly. The fans who won the fanart contest for Chapter 5 never got their posters actually in game due to it being rushed. Not only was chapter 5 a big slap to the face story wise, but it was literally so rushed he couldn't be bothered to add in the art his fans gave him for his game FOR FREE. [Meatly blames this on a crazy timeline, reminder him and Mike are the literal ceos of this company. The proposal of future updates here is also pretty cruel considering Mike nowadays happily admits he corrupted Chapter 5's source code and therefore literally can't update it At All currently. Because he is a moron]
At least they got to be in Boris and the dark survival, and by that I mean that was the Only game they got to be in so far, isn't that just treating your fans like you love them? Shoving their hard work into a spin off game almost nobody has played or addresses much. [Hell, who knows if with the Lone Wolf rebrand they'll even stay there. In which case they'll be in None of the games, only in the credits of BATIM]
6. The Bendy fans who just generally disagree with him on stuff. Like the new ink demon design where there is literally a public poll showing people generally prefer the old one.
7. The Bendy fans who can see he is actively lying to them. To their fucking faces.
He says this has always been the case, but screenshots and links to tweets regarding the books being canon prove it was not. Does he really think bendy fans are stupid or something? [Unless he's admitting here he lied to Kress when he told her the books were canon which sounds worse!]
8. Anyone who doesn't like the idea of giving money to a guy who laid off tons of employees then afterwards thought it was a great idea to express his anti-union views! Also brag about how good of an employer he was, according to his employees, he was not!
So in summary; Mike is an awful person who has not learned anything from the awful things he did. I will not be purchasing The Cage because, combined with this and his absolute refusal to take any kind of critique or see any differing interpretation of his franchise, I have no reason to think my problems with the franchise will ever be addressed or fixed. I probably will pirate The Cage along with any future Bendy Products [Including the movie] and will do my best to avoid giving it any kind of monetary support. Unless this changes any time soon, I can't see myself making anymore positive Bendy posts soon.
Mike has just managed to make it so hard to speak positively or optimistically of this franchise when he's so willing to broadcast how little he cares about it or its fans. I'm at the point where I refuse to pull any of my punches with my problems with it. What's the point of trying to play nice with my critique when either way the people creating it don't care?
So with this post, I want to invite anyone who feels similarly about the franchise to tell me, make a post or send an ask talking about how all of this makes you feel. It may not change how things are, but genuinely seeing other people share my feelings of anger makes me feel better. It feels nice to see when other people share our same concerns and worries. I'd also love to know if anyone else thinks they'll be avoiding purchasing Bendy products over this.
I'm not forcing anyone to participate in it nor trying to say anyone who doesn't supports mike but genuinely maybe if we can collectively decide to boycott things like the movie, graphic novel and The Cage... It might at least make the bendy devs acknowledge how much they have destroyed their own fandom's faith and trust in them.
The way Mike tweets about his actions like he had no control over why people were mad at him at least proves to me he takes NONE of it back nor regrets it. If you didn't know about his actions and only went off his tweets, you would be led to believe Mike has been needlessly picked apart by fans over things he couldn't control [or in his own words, had his words twisted and taken out of context]. That is not how you speak about your actions if you have actually learned better from them.
anyway, that has been my bendy dev callout post. This is an open invitation to anyone feeling similarly upset about the way the franchise is going to talk about it. It's genuinely nice to see how people feel about this and the more we talk about the more it's likely the bendy devs are forced to address our concerns. I don't think they will but hey, that's why I'm not gonna support them with my money anymore nor am I gonna be nice to them in any content I make critiquing Bendy. I mean I'm also basically making this post just in case anyone asks me Why I feel this way towards to bendy devs/as a way to respond to anyone who thinks I am too harsh in my critique in the future.
As always, it seems the best part of Bendy isn't actually anything about canon but about what the fan's are creating with the ideas Bendy failed to do anything interesting with.
Also the books, the books slap.
#batim#batdr#bendy and the ink machine#bendy and the dark revival#ramblez#bendy and the silent city#bendy the cage#for the record another reason Im making this post is bc some of the only good resources to learn abt why the bendy devs suck are some old#very longer videos and this is a very long post but I thought it was important to document the recent shit theyve been doing alongside some#of the worst past things theyve done bc Mike has been trying to misinform people on what happened but those videos are still great resource#if you want more info n such#long post#mike D#for anyone who doesnt wanna hear abt him since he doesnt go by mood anymore#sorry if this is rambley or emotional Im just so sick of these guys fr dskjhgskdfjghskdjhgkjhsd#I miss when I didnt spend my days stressed about the awful shit mike is gonna say next and how I would have to disprove it in a post later#or explain why its bad to have a cast of nothing but cishet white guys n constantly fight back against any push for diversity in said cast#genuinely its just tiring esp when u see other bendy fans give ignorant or very silly defenses/takes on those things#n then u lose a lot of respect for them bc they are speaking on stuff they dont know much abt so confidently and therefore misinforming#people or even encouraging very bad views on stuff like diversity n its importance#Im not saying people like that are bad people but it is stressful n upsetting when u see someone u thought knew better do that sort of thin#it makes it hard to trust them again on other issues bc u now dont trust they know what they r talking abt!!#like please think twice before telling young artists making norman white was a tough and complicated decision it was fucking not the bendy#devs just think all their humans are white by default and dont wanna change that its been proven time n time again thats all it is#and defending them just bc u like a franchise they made is very very bad!! They are not ur friends!! they suck and we seriously need to#stop pretending they dont!! toxic positivity is only gonna make the fandom an absolute nightmare its not gonna make ANYTHING better#it just means people will be forced to PRETEND they never have negative thoughts abt the franchise n therefore make them burned out#just look at other similar fandoms please lets not make those same mistakes!!#sorry can u tell Ive been having just. A time recently#anyways back to making my queer ass bendy fan game full of so much diversity mike will prolly shit when he sees it DKFJGHKSDJHGKJHSD
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"...I would go to the ends of the earth and back for you. I would die for you.
And now I don't know what it means. If it means anything."
#NOOOOOOOOO#IM SO UPSET#WE WERE SO HAPPY 6 EPISODES AGO#FIRST IT WAS LAURANCE BEING SO INSENSITIVE#NOW#NOW ITS THIS#woah aer talks?#aphmau#minecraft diaries#mcd#minecraft diaries aphmau#aphmau mcd#aphmau minecraft diaries#mcd aphmau#garroth ro'meave#mcd garroth#garroth mcd#laurance zvahl#mcd laurance#laurance mcd#AND IT WAS VOICE ACTED TOO.#IM STRESSED THE FUCK OUT.#OH MY GOD AND ON THE EPISODE CALLED ''Garroth''#THIS IS SO UPSETTING#HIS VOICE CATCHING ON THAT FIRST ''for you''#STOP#I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE#''I was such an idiot.'' NOOOOO YOU AREN'T PLEASE COME BACK#MY HEART PLEASE#aer's revisiting block game roleplays
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Mmmmight be making a team to help run the Stareater au! As we've come to a realisation how slow the story would be told without help (we both artists...so writing definitely ain't our strong suit) but I'm Determined!!! to tell the story in its entirety
we already have some very talented artist friends willing to draw episodes covers occasionally! And also help with stuff like proof reading!
And I do still want to do most of the heavy lifting with the au as it don't wanna put any stress on others ..buttt I do need help with writing and sorta have to bite the bullet and ask for help haha
But writers are where we need the most help currently
Thing is I wouldn't know the first thing about how to find ppl willing to help with writing. I also wanna make sure I'm organised and know at least some skill when it comes to running a collaborative project like this, to avoid any stress, because that's honestly my biggest fear to stress people out like I have been :') cos we're also we're doing all this for free and purely as a self indulgent project
HM so ..if you got any advice on how to find writers or run a team! Tell meee
For now I'll focus on ...uni work considering I'm also doing that on the side HAH
But yeah! ..also ep 5 as soon as I have the time to finalise it!
#stareater au#immmm so very dylexic and really try my best to do as much of the writing i can and i have been improving...but its alot haha#but im also bad at asking for help#hhhhh also idk how i woukd judge writers- the idea of being judgemental in the slightest and potentially upset ppl scared me-#hmmmdvgshdhdb#but this au means so much to me and asides from the mild stress im having so much fun and im so excited!!!#anywya ramble-
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i miss hermie
#my demons won#guys im so upset this week has sucked#take me back to the good ol days (chaotic stressful dndads tuesdays)#hopefully this summer will be as good as the last#bc god last summer was so fun#siren says
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I don't really share my comic sketches here but I think this one is silly
#while reading dunmeshi i rlly saw similarities of laios and mui#its why laios is my 2nd (or 3rd. idk if the first one counts as 1 person or 2-3 people) manga character#im so upset laios's feelings for squid/octo has been forever tainted by that parasite#SENSHI TOLD YOU ITS EDIBLE WHEN YOU COOK IT IDIOT!!!#also id feel like mui's tentacles would taste weird bc of how stressed they are. at least his bangs#munch sketches#my comic#mui#jun#my oc#my ocs
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Hi, this is *not* an emergency but my little baby Thursday has a nasty lesion on the side of her neck of unknown origin (the vet thinks it's related to her allergies) and I've had to pay out my ass for vet bills and meds for her so if you love this little girlie and would like her to not continue being covered in blood consider throwing a coin to your game dev-who-is-currently-too-mentally ill-to-develop-games 🥲
Well wishes are also very welcome and will be forwarded to her in between me begging her not to scratch it because we haven't got the collar to stop her scratching it yet
(More pics under the cut because she is very cute but very ghastly at the moment)
Observe: she turns on her side and exposes her neck to turn my relaxing bath into a much less relaxing bath
#she's going to be okay#it's not infected as far as we know and she's on antibiotics#it's just that we have to get her a fancy collar that isn't quite a cone to keep her from scratching it#and until that arrives hopefully tomorrow she can continue scratching it and showing up covered in blood and giving her dad a heart attack#i am really fucking upset about this entire thing tbh it's bringing up some Trauma TM and even though she doesn't seem to be in much pain#obviously she is bloody and itchy and upset and stressed that we keep putting creams and sprays on her and bringing her places#it's killing me tbh#also. yes. i sew in the bath..it's relaxing okay#tumblr keeps completely fucking this post up and removing the readmore so i had to remove some pics of her im sorry
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genuinely why is there so much misinformation about the guardians of childhood book series?
#Lemme be a toxic fan for a moment bc im so tired and stressed and i need to yell my silly fandom frustrations out to the void#The people saying Jack is fourteen in them. No.#He can manipulate his age from 11 to 18 and is dating a 25 yr old#people still insist that the books are connected to the movie despite there being no possibility for that since 2018#And like they totally guess what happens in the books#I saw someone try to say that dreamworks were being 'weird' and aged Jack up to ship him with tooth but in the books he was a child#three things: He's not fourteen (see above for age. He's essentially an adult and is treated as such) and is dating an adult#And he didn't make an official appearance in the books until 2018. Six years AFTER the movies release#and thirdly dreamworks aged him DOWN????#Joyce's og idea was an adult with a wife + kids ???#Like what are you talking about#never mind the people insisting that JACK IS 12???? NO??? Where did you get ur information bc wtf???#the movie started production (in 2008) before any of the books even existed (first book was published in 2011)#We have no idea how much of the books they had! The most they had were Joyce's ideas that were subject to change (and boy did they change)#the walking eggs in the movie didn't come from the book (even tho they're in there) they came from Joyce's doodling on notes!#The third book published alongside the movie tie-in books and then days later the finished film premiered at the Mill Valley Film Festival#by the time the second book rolled around (2012) the movie was probably finished and was just getting distributed by paramount and#was possibly even finished in 2011! Four years of production of the movie and then the first book got released#I cannot express enough how much the books are not the source material for the movie. If anything is it's the 2005 short film Joyce made#God it's so infuriating to see people discussing the books like they're the Bible without having read it. I get so irrationally upset#And why are we talking about the books like they have any relevance to the movie after 2018? that book completely severed all ties#Like I get it if people want to connect them but you'd have to ignore the entire last book to do that (which yeah most do)#but there's so many assumptions about the books and it makes it clear who got their into from fan rumors and who actually read them#if you are basing ur understanding of a book you've never read based on fanfic maybe you just shouldn’t say anything about the book#rotg#rise of the guardians#guardians of childhood#goc
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They only have one brain cell because they're interchangeable as protagonist.
#my characters#a while ago i made up a fake gacha premise on a side blog and im so sad that i got anxiety#and stress and depression and wasnt able to use it like i wanted#but it was gonna be a comic post then a poll to vote for what happens next#as a choose your own adventure#and every post would alternate the protag gender but nothing else#i named them adam and eve and thats the only difference#theyre both incredibly silly goobers with a singular brain cell who like fish#and there was a guide mascot character being who would talk to them mentally but wasnt traveling with them#and the poor guide was so upset at how stupid the protag was
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hmmmm mal du pays thoughts tonight
#radio rambles#i should go to bed but. it is on the mind#isat spoilers#<- for the . wall of tags to come#imm wondering what most people hc mdp to like. be#i know its most popular to see it as siffrins sadness. i do think thats p neat#and probably the intention#but im. juggling around the idea of? siffrin system moment? mdp as a headmate? if yall see that vision?#most inspired by that ‘do u hc this character as a system’ post abt siffrin#and i voted no then but now im like genuinely changing my mind JFKFKF#it makes sense in a way. and into my mdp hc that it. wouldve split while sif was very young#splitting due to stress which leads to a lot of. gestures vaguely. mdp’s whole thing#a mix of stress but also this sense of longing to. belong somewhere. to not be alone#many years ago it was about the loss of their home. and much later on became more related to its feelings towards their family#mdp is a scared child to me . idk about yalls hcs for it but thats what im sticking to#a scared child who maybe grew up a little alongside the body. but still Young and Scared#its not as often or eager to front as siffrin is. i can imagine it being much more hover-y or . POSSIBLY. cohosting if its feeling up to it#uhm. ok well#so i typed this out and now im actually really sad about mdp jgkdkf where is mdp recovery#now im kinda thinking about it fronting for once to properly meet the party and. and receiving comfort. and and and#wow christ im upset#also also glancing over at marias sibling au for character dynamics here….. sillies…..#ps not relevant to my mdp thoughts but fyi im imagining siffin in headspace looks very much like their body#the difference being. much darker clothes. more stars etc. maybe different hair#think like how a lot of ppl style their human loops. thats kinda how i imagine sif in headspace#SPEAKING OF LOOP#i think given the time he spent with them it woulf make sense if they split a loop as well#and ofc other members of the party jgkfkf#im not gonna get into my hcs there because ill b taking away from my mdp hc post BUT#thinking. always thinking
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heads up, updates are gonna be a little fast and loose since my irl job is picking up speed again
#pls dont get upset spaget if you see me doodling or drawing other stuff#work has been... something. so im really needing to draw for stress relief#ooc#thinking of doodling other mlb au stuff to clean the palate
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